


i could be the one if you want me to

by lumineres



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 2k words of legitimate patheticism, Coming Out, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Oblivious Louis, Pining, Pining Harry, The X Factor Era, im so pathetic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 14:06:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1094803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumineres/pseuds/lumineres
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you're my lad<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	i could be the one if you want me to

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda short and not my best work but I've been working very very slowly on it for months so please be kind to me  
> Title from Say Something by A Great Big World  
> disclaimer: i dont own anything all events are product of my imagination blah blah blah

Harry's really not quite sure how it happened.

  
Honestly.

  
One minute he was completely like normal (of course he was crying his eyes out and his dreams were crushed but yeah he was normal) and then the next he's in a band with possibly the most gorgeous creature to ever walk this planet (and those three other guys, but he'll love them later.)

  
 _Louis Tomlinson._

  
As if walking into him in the bathroom wasn't heart stopping enough, and taking a picture with him wasn't completely earth shattering enough, now he's, at the very _least_ , going to spend like _months_ with him?

  
???¿¿¿???

  
And, if they make it, _years_?

  
And now, The Most Gorgeous Creature to Ever Walk This Planet has his feet tucked under Harry's thigh ("Hazza you're warm and I'm cold this is the obvious solution") and they're watching the Titanic on the couch in the X factor house. Louis' toes are wiggling to a rhythm into Harry's skin that feels suspiciously like Jingle Bells, thought its not really near Christmastime.

  
The realization comes to Harry at odd times of day, his head reeling with it. Louis might brush his knuckles across Harry's back during rehearsal and Harry will be spiraled into a whirling cacophony of the best kind of drowning feeling. Or Louis might call him Curly and Harry is thrown into a flurry of chaotic, frantic thoughts and inner blushes and silent giggles.

  
So maybe he is sure how it happened, he's sure that he fell into Louis like leaves fall to the ground in the autumn or how toast infallibly lands on the butter side or a shooting star drives deep into the earth: hard and fast and bright and burning.

  
But he's not going to pine after his new best friend. He's just going to admire, and what happens happens.

  
Harry just hopes what he wants to happen happens.

 

 

Harry tells the boys he's bi on the third week. He figures going much farther could create a huge rift, if they thought he was keeping this from them, and doing it so early saves a tiny bit of heartbreak if they decide they want nothing to do with him. They're all in their tiny room, sitting on their respective beds.

  
"Curly, just spit it out." Louis urges him. Harry's been pacing for a few minutes, starting and stopping his words.

  
"Louis don't rush him!" Liam scolds, and Harry cracks a small, fond smile when Louis rolls his eyes.

  
He takes a deep breath, opens his mouth, and this time the words come out, "I'm bisexual."

  
There's a beat of silence in which Niall looks curious, Zayn looks like, whatever, Liam looks a little surprised, but Louis is just grinning like a loon.

  
"I-is that okay with everyone?" Harry asks shakily as the silence drags on. Everyone seems to splutter into life and its when Niall hugs him tight that he realizes he'd begun to cry.

  
"Yes, of course it's okay, Harry we love you no matter where you put your penis." Niall assures him.

  
"Niall!" Liam scolds, (again, he really is very uptight isn't he? The word penis is entirely appropriate in this situation.)

  
Niall laughs into Harry's ear and then everyone's piling on him, a giant group hug of hair-kisses and tickling, but maybe Louis' the only one doing that.

 

 

"Curly, you up?" Harry hears from the bunk above his. Of course he was, fantasizing about this exact scenario but probably with a very different end.

  
"Yeah." He replies quietly, as not to wake Zayn, Liam, and Niall.

  
"M'nervous." Louis says, and its striking, because Louis is so strong, so impenetrable, that the notion he can be scared or nervous seems frankly ridiculous.

  
"Me too." Harry replies, "but we'll be alright."

  
"You think so?"

  
"Yeah, we sing it better than Bonnie Tyler." Harry grins.

  
"Lets not get ahead of ourselves there, Curly." Louis says, and Harry can hear the smile in his voice.

  
"Would you pipe down over there?" Liam grumbles, and Harry hears Louis blow a raspberry at him.

  
"Come up and sleep with me, Haz?" Louis asks after a minute of silence, in which Harry nearly fell asleep. Harry murmurs an affirmation and forces his limbs to work. He stands on the edge of the bottom bunk, cold air hitting the warm skin of his bare torso. Louis is leaning on one elbow, his other hand holding the blankets open for Harry. Harry uses his arms and pushes himself up, so his feet dangle in midair. He leans forward, bending over the railing and his face flopping into Louis' tummy. He giggles into the warm skin there and squirms, moving his hips until he's a pile of limbs and curls on the bed. He untangles himself, keeping his face buried in Louis' golden skin and giggling. He presses a kiss there, gentle and soft, and maybe Louis didn't notice but maybe he did.

  
He rearranges himself then so his head is on the pillow, though nothing could really compare to the softness of Louis' belly.

  
"It's a good thing you like being the little spoon." Louis says, reaching out and pulling Harry close to him. Harry just smiles into the skin of Louis' forearm before turning over so his back is pressed to Louis' chest. Every point of contact feels like he's burning, like the sun is swallowing him whole.

  
He falls asleep, pleasantly on fire.

 

 

"You know," Louis starts, it's 2 AM and they should sleep for their long days of rehearsals tomorrow, but that's just too bad, "I really just, like, I just want a nice lad, you know?"  
Harry swallows thickly, "Yeah, I get you."

  
"Like just- a boy who will like laugh at all my dumb jokes and tell me I look nice and cook for me because I'm shit-" so, me Harry thinks, "- and like we could have a lot of sex and then kiss and cuddle a lot, I mean it's been a while since I've had a proper kiss or fucked anyone and like I miss that, but it's been even longer since I've had an actual relationship. I just want to be someone's boy, and I want them to be my lad, you know?"

  
"I know." Harry assures him. He knows so much. It's all he knows, most of the time, his nerve endings tingle with it, making him think he can feel the atoms whirring in his molecules and cells. His stomach tries to digest itself, fold in on itself, stop existing. His skin yearns for Louis and he's always a star in his dreams. The want is an inherent part of his person, now. If there were a person dictionary, his would be "curly hair, likes to sing, weird, wants Louis Tomlinson"- hell, his synonym could be want.

  
But apparently he isn't Louis' "lad".

 

 

"And I'd marry you, Harry."

  
The words run down Harry's spine like a bullet, shattering and spilling red all over everything. It's all he can do to contain his grin so it doesn't split his face in two. This is a regular occurrence, especially in the video diaries, Louis will say something that completely ruin every one of Harry's senses and stop his heart for the fleetest of moments. For half a second he'll feel like he's drowning in caramel (the way he's always wanted to go) and then he'll resurface and his heart will kick start into over drive and it hurts how unrequited this love is.

  
Harry regrets saying David Hasselhough.

  
Harry regrets thinking the word 'love', because now it won't leave him be.

  
Harry regrets not telling him then and there.

 

 

"Harold?" Louis says one night with Harry's face buried in his neck.

  
"Yes, Louold?" Harry replies into his skin. He feels Louis scoff at him, mutter, "Dork," and then there's a best of silence. "Never mind." Louis says, and presses a kiss to Harry's curls.

  
Sleep washes over him like the sea washes over the shore at high tide- it takes his toes first and slowly slowly fills him up with a buzzing warmth until just the tippity top of him pokes out, just the last little bit of consciousness remains in his mind, and just as the last wave over takes him, he hears Louis whisper something into his scalp, but he's too far gone.

 

 

Everyone's sitting at breakfast, except for Matt and Zayn who slept in, and Harry's wishing he had. He can't stop yawning, the rehearsals and shows and fans and publicity are really taking a toll on him.

  
"Sleepy." He murmurs, leaning over and dropping his head onto Louis' shoulder. He feels Louis card his fingers through Harry's curls and he lets out a little sigh.

  
"Boys, if it's alright, could Curly over here and I skip rehearsals today? I've got some things I need to do out and I'd like some company." Louis asks and Harry sees Cher and Niall share a look through his hooded eyelids, one that Harry can't really read.

  
"Hey, do I get a say in this? You know I hate errands." Harry says slowly, scrunching up his nose.

  
"No, you'll like these errands." Louis assures him. Harry shrugs, the motion awkward with his position against Louis.

  
"Sure, I guess, if Niall's alright with that?" Liam says. Niall nods, mouth stuffed with pancake.

  
A half an hour later, Harry's all dressed and ready to go wherever it is he's going with Louis. Louis told him to wear something comfy, so he's just in sweatpants and his favorite Jack Wills sweatshirt. Louis' in his onesie from the video diaries a couple weeks ago, waiting for Harry at the door. He holds out his elbow to him and Harry takes it with a grin.  
"And we're off!" Louis announces, marching forward and leading Harry to his car. They slide into the vehicle. Harry's mouth opens in an impossibly wide yawn and he feels Louis' hand reach up and pet his hair.

  
"Kitten." He murmurs, and if Harry wasn't so tired he'd probably get a little turned on by that, but he's sixteen, everything Louis' does turns him on at least a little bit, every sliver of golden skin that peeks from under his t shirts flashes through Harry's mind in a montage when he's in the shower with his hand wrapped ground himself and two fingers in his hole. But anyway.

  
"Where're we going?" Harry slurs through the tail end of his yawn.

  
"Sleepy's, to test out mattresses." Louis says, eyes now on the road as he drives.

  
"That's your urgent errand?" Harry asks incredulously, laughing though.

  
"Yeah, I mean, you were really tired and you deserve some sleep. And if we want to move in together after we have to decide on how firm or soft we want our beds to be."

  
"So we're going to nap in the middle of a mattress store?"

  
"Mhm." Louis nods, smiling.

  
"Isn't that like, against the rules?"

  
"Yes, but when has that ever stopped me?" Louis grins, and Harry nods, agreeing.

  
They get to the store within twenty minutes, and within another twenty, they're fast asleep on a mattress together.

  
Within fifty minutes, they've been kicked out.

  
It's still perfect.

 

 

It's during Harry's solo in Your Song that it hits Louis like a freight train. He's listening to Harry's voice wreathing itself around the arena and kissing his ears, just like Louis'd kissed Harry's ears when he was asleep. It smashes into him, every cell of his body exploding with it- it's Harry. It's always been Harry. It will always be Harry.

  
He nearly forgets to sing, all he can think about is kissing Harry, kissing every inch of him and telling every bit of his milky skin how much he loves him and feeling every individual strand of hair in between his fingers and knowing they're his and that he's Harry's.

  
But the performance ends and there's the judges comments and then backstage there's people milling around them everywhere and then there's the results in front of hundreds of people.

  
And they find out they're going to the finals, but Louis' bones are vibrating with this need to tell Harry, with this realization. Harry turns to him immediately to hug him, ecstatic, the finals, and Louis holds on tighter than he usually would, his heart racing, and says into Harry's ear, "You're my lad."

  
Harry pulls back, his eyes wide and he knows exactly what Louis meant.

  
And when they get backstage again Harry pulls Louis into the bathroom.

  
"Did you mean that?" He asks, breathless. His hands are shaking. Louis just smiles, cups Harry's face in his hands, and kisses the 'I really did' into his lips.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is spankingkink.tumblr.com (previously youremylad) my twitter is @zerrries  
> Comments and kudos make me very very happy!!


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